Dear New York Mets,
As you probably know, you have a game tonight, a nationally-televised game no less. (I say “probably” because at times this season it seems you are unaware that you’re competing in an actual game.) I write to you because so far this season you’ve done nothing but embarrass yourselves and, in turn, your fan base, while playing on the national stage. Perhaps tonight will be different.
First, let’s recap what you’ve done so far in 2009.
May 2, at Philadelphia Phillies, FOX: Oliver Perez walks six in 2.1 innings and Sean Green walks in the winning run in the tenth. Mets lose, 6-5.
May 17, at San Francisco Giants, ESPN: Mike Pelfrey balked not once, not twice, but THREE times. Two of them led directly to San Fran runs, as the Mets lose 2-0.
June 28, vs New York Yankees, ESPN: More Sunday Night Baseball embarrassment, as Francisco Rodriguez walks Yankees closer Mariano Rivera with the bases loaded in the ninth, giving the Yanks an insurance run they wouldn’t even need as Rivera locked down his 500th career save. Mets lose, 4-2.
There are other bad, nationally-televised losses, but not bad enough to say they were embarrassing. But I think these three should suffice.
In all fairness to you, the New York Mets, you’ve played pretty terribly on regular, locally-televised games too. I mean, that time you dropped the pop-up to lose the game and the time you missed third base to lose the game—neither of those were on national TV. So maybe this is just how you play.
But make no mistake about it: It’s a lot worse when it happens on FOX or ESPN. We Mets fans get enough crap from Yankees fans—we don’t need to hear it via e-mail and text message from Tigers, Red Sox, and Dodgers fans, too.
So maybe tonight you could not embarrass yourselves. Don’t get me wrong, you don’t even have to win. You can lose; that’s fine. Just don’t lose in an absurdly laughable way.
New York Mets Fans
P.S. You know what, do whatever you want. I don’t think I’m going to watch.