College Football Week 5 Rap

Michigan is the target of many of my lyrics in this week’s college football rap recap:

Here are the lyrics, delivered over Dr. Dre’s “What’s the Difference”:

It started on Thursday: a couple of shootouts
UCLA scored 62 in Bruins rout
They’d been fallin in the rankings
Just cuz they won a few close games without no spankings
Now they’re hankering for a playoff seed
But let me tell you what this new playoff needs:
Four great teams we need ’em to rise up
Not eight decent ones that we have to divide up
It’s only Week 5 but five bucks
Says three SEC teams are sized up and with my luck
A fifth gets in plus this just in:
That crashing sound you heard was Michigan
What’s wrong with Hoke and Co.?
I hope that Bo’s not rolling over and seeing the smoke that blows
Over this tire fire and what I admired
Is now a program where tickets go for Coca Cola
Hold up, no you know what?
Brandon needs to go like Homer needs a donut
This is so nuts anyway Seminoles rolled
And A&M too but they have holes
25 completions in a row?
That’s more than all season for New Mexico
Charlie’s gone who’s next to go?
I guess I know it has nothing to do with an X or O

I have arbitrarily decided that last season is no longer a factor in my playoff predictions. That means Florida State is no longer the top seed:

Also considered: Alabama, Oklahoma, Mississippi State
Also considered: Alabama, Oklahoma, Mississippi State

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